The quiet strength of softness

How being soft always wins over being hard

Hey there,

I hope your last week was full of serenity.

Today, I want to talk about a concept that goes against our our usual ideas of strength and power: The power of softness.

In a world that always pushes us to be strong, tough, and resilient, being soft often gets mistaken for weakness.

We are taught to break through walls and overcome obstacles.

To stand firm and confident, and not to give in.

To be hard, both physically and mentally.

But what if I told you that being soft could actually be more powerful?

In Daoism, "softness" means being flexible, adaptable, and patient. While "hardness" refers to being rigid, forceful, and resistant. This applies not just to physical traits but also to mental states.

Imagine a stream flowing down a mountain.

It's soft, yielding, and gentle. Yet, over time, it carves its path even through hard rocks.

The stream doesn't fight against the rock. But simply flows around it. Slowly wearing it away over time.

And the rock – tough and strong as it may be – eventually surrenders to the gentle and unwavering flow of the water.

That's the power of softness.

Softness allows us to flow with the curves and turns of life, while hardness makes us confrontational and inflexible.

Softness allows us to bend without breaking. To sway with the winds of change instead of fighting against them. It helps us look at things from different angles and find new solutions we might not have noticed before.

In relationships, being soft means being understanding and compassionate. It's about being open and vulnerable instead of shutting down or lashing out. This helps create a safe space where others can trust us and be their true selves.

Nobody wants a partner or friend who is constantly hard and unyielding. It's exhausting and unsustainable.

In leadership, softness means leading with empathy and emotional intelligence. It’s about listening to different viewpoints and being open to change instead of pushing our own ideas. Soft leadership creates a space where collaboration thrives and everyone’s voice gets heard.

Nobody wants a boss who is always rigid and unrelenting. It's demotivating and stifling.

Softness doesn't mean giving up or giving in. And it also doesn't mean being weak or passive.

It means having the strength to adapt and flow.

And it takes immense strength to stay calm in tough situations, to show compassion instead of anger, and to let go of control when needed.

So, next time you're faced with a challenge or conflict, try to tap into your inner softness.

Be like water.

Flow with grace and patience.

And watch as the quiet strength of softness overcomes any hardness in its path.

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Weekly Reflection

What is one challenge in my life right now that I can approach with softness instead of hardness?

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🍵 Thank you for reading!

Thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts with you! I hope they bring you a moment of reflection and a touch of peace.

Until next time, stay soft.

– Zhenya

P.S. If you're new here, it's nice to meet you! I invite you to check out the past editions to get a sense of what my Teacup is all about. You might also enjoy my free course, The Way of the Dao, where you can uncover ancient Chinese wisdom that will help transform your life and find the inner peace you’ve been searching for.